I can't believe it's been months since I've even been on here...yet there are my faithful still checking for updates!! You guys are fabulous!!!
Motherhood is wonderful =)......
Don't misunderstand.....wonderful but exhausting...there are sooooo many things no one prepares you for. Everyone tells you about the precious things like smiles, giggles, and looking into your eyes....but no one and I do mean NO ONE tells you about things that make you crazy or that are just down right awful.
Example???
No one warned poor me that you must flip little one's noggin every night or they just might develop a nice little flat spot that may require a fabulous helmet - would have been awesome to know in advance.....now we are desperately trying to fix said flat spot before it requires that little helmet.
No one warned me that getting her to nap would be a personal challenge that rarely resulted in victory for anyone.....napping never equated screaming and crying and down right hysterics in ANY of the baby books I read. Books that everyone brags about, it seems someone conveniently forgot to write that chapter....
No one warned me that the after effects of 2 month shots were equivalent to having your finger nails ripped out....2 hours of inconsolable screams and a red face nightmare later we figured out that Tylenol worked wonders and you should probably (most definitely) give it to her PRIOR to the poking of the needles....Let me tell you how awful it is to see your little one getting the shots in the first place, they go from happy smiley baby to turning red and opening their mouths and being so upset that ZERO sound emerges from their little mouths....yeah...I cried....then I cried some more when she had nuclear meltdown at home because her little legs were so sore.......one word..TYLENOL, it will be your best friend.
No one warned me that every night the torture method of sleep deprivation would occur. The fun kind where you fall into a deep sleep and are suddenly awakened by the one in control. She doesn't let you forget =) that SHE controls when you sleep.....just when you think you're in a great routine, she changes it just enough to torture you =)...and even when she doesn't wake, then you wake wondering why she didn't wake.....vicious circle after vicious circle.......
She's the sleep Nazi.
One of the last things I will tell you about for now is:
No one warns you about "baby blowouts".......
Have any idea what I'm talking about??? If not, here's a slight warning - this is not for the weak stomached people. If you are one, then please do not read any further.........
For those of you remaining, well......you asked for it.
Baby blowouts.....
The best, most kind terminology I can think of. Recently we discovered these. Normally Miss Lily's beautiful little face turns beet red when she's desperately trying to leave us her daily present. Normally it's pretty cut and dry. She poops, we change her (meaning - one of us..this will be important in a bit) takes only a minute or two - no real mess, easy breezy.......all that changed a few days ago. Poor Miss Lily. She didn't sleep real well the night before and was up a bit early. Her normal schedule is to leave us a gift while in the middle of feeding her. That day was no different. I should have been warned by the mini earthquake rumbling in her belly.....I should have, but I wasn't. Mommy rookie mistake number 745 (just guessing). So we sat together and I waited, like usual, for her to finish. The effort she put forth was really minimal for that day..no red face.....should have been warning number 2......nope, didn't equate. Mommy rookie mistake number 746.....suddenly it hit me.....the most god awful smell I have EVER EVER EVER had the displeasure of wafting through my nostrils....it burned....I gagged. I immediately wisked her to her room and the waiting changing table...I was scared...very scared. I placed her gently on the pad....she smiled up at me and kicked her little cute feet (probably should not have let her do that)........I slid off her little pants and unfastened her onsie....diaper wrapped around her little bottom loomed ahead....
I paused....
I figured - "it can't be that bad...it's just a diaper"...oh how wrong was I? I unfastened the little tabs and the most awful sight lay ahead......
There was poo EVERY WHERE!!!!
It looked like someone poured a vat of Gray Poupon in my little girl's diaper - GROSS....I took baby wipe after baby wipe...and tried to hold her legs with one hand so that she wouldn't get it every where and use the other to desperately clean the stuff out of every nook and cranny on Miss Chubby Thighs(she gets those from me).
Now here's where I made rookie mistake 747.....
I got her all clean and I did what I always do - I lived life on the edge and pulled that diaper out from underneath her. BIG MISTAKE!!! HUGE!! Apparantly she wasn't finished. As soon as that diaper was out from under her, she let loose. It was on the changing table, on her clothes and all over her once more. I continued to gag and clean all over again. EWWWWWWW. That's all I can say. Daddy thought it was funny.
Well...
Daddy got his today. I was soaking my aching back in a nice hot bath when Daddy had to do it by himself. The past couple of times we worked together to avoid a big mess but since I was soaking, he was flying solo...hee hee. From my warm heaven, I hear:
"OH NO...don't do that!!!"
I started cracking up!! She got Daddy good. He thought she was done, just like me. To his horror...she wasn't. It was on her, her socks, the changing table!! I jumped out the bath, grab a robe and stood dripping trying to help with the situation......she laid there smiling and giggling at both of us...snot.
Things nobody warned us about......I'm warning you!!!
On a better note, the things people do tell you about, well it doesn't even do justice to actually seeing it yourself. Like when she looks at you with her big blue eyes and smiles because she knows you....or the tinkling sound of her precious giggles=) It's priceless and brings tears to my eyes every time I hear her. The sound of her little voice chatting with her bib or whatever toy is in her view. It sounds like she's holding a full fledged conversation with them. So cute. I just want to eat her up =)
Daddy says I need "Mommy time" so I am vowing to take an hour and write here everyday =)......let's see how long that lasts!!!
2 comments:
lol.... no one tells you because in all honesty.... you don't remember the bad.... only the good.... you wont remember the sleepless nights when Lily looks up to you and says "i love you mommy" for the very first time.... You wont remember the poopy diapers when your precious little one walks over to her potty chair, pulls down her panties and her pullup and pees on the potty without any help and says, "mommy, i'm a big girl...." The only time you'll remember any of this is when you encounter a rookie mom who's sharing her experiences with you and asking your opinion on how to handle this or deal with that... only then do you remember... and its always with the biggest smile.
You're doing fantastic girl! Its taken 4 months for her to poop on you? that's a record.... most rookies experience that in the first few weeks....
My favorite gross memory.... I had just fed Jacquelyn her evening bottle (one more to go at bed time) when her daddy came in from work and picked her up and was playing with her over head.... before i could warn him, he was holding her above his head making her laugh, his mouth open wide in the biggest and best daddy smile he could muster when it happened... (and you could hear the escaping air belch loudly from the bottom of her toes...) Jacquelyn proceeded to throw up her entire 8 ounce bottle of baby formula (well curdled i might add for only being in her tummy about 15 minutes) right on her daddy's face and into his open mouth. it took heroic effort to catch her as he doubled over ready to be sick himself since i was laughing so hard.... but i managed to catch the now crying child and get her calmed down while her daddy made a bee line for the bathroom to retch up what ever contents he had on his stomach.
So fear not. Rookie you may be, but you certainly are not alone in your trials and tribulations of motherhood. We've all been there. And we all can agree that there isn't one single moment we'd give up. You learn as you go, and if you have another, it will be that much easier. and if you dont, well then you'll be a fountain of wonderful knowledge for Lily when she has little ones of her own some day.
xoxo
You know you are having post pardom dep. Ha Ha Ha Ha. I told you so
MOM
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